


Harry Potter and the Plastics of Hogwarts

by drarryholic8



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Mean Girls (2004)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Mean Girls Fusion, Alternate Universe - No Voldemort, Angst, Anti-Muggle Content, Arguing, Draco Malfoy & Harry Potter Friendship, F/M, Fluff, Happy Ending, Hermione Granger is a Good Friend, Lucius Malfoy is a cool dad, M/M, Mean Girls Quotes, Mean Girls References, Muggle-born Pride, One-Sided Attraction, Ron Weasley is a Good Friend
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-15
Updated: 2019-05-15
Packaged: 2020-03-06 00:18:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18839761
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/drarryholic8/pseuds/drarryholic8
Summary: Teenage Wizard Harry Potter was educated in muggle London by his adoptive wizarding dads. After much persuasion with Sirius, Harry finally gets to experience a real wizarding school school and gets a quick primer on the cruel, tacit laws of popularity that divide his fellow students into tightly knit cliques. He unwittingly finds himself in the good graces of an elite group of cool students dubbed "the Plastics," with the hot blonde, Draco Malfoy being their ring leader. But Harry soon realizes how his shallow group of new friends earned this nickname.





	Harry Potter and the Plastics of Hogwarts

Sirius and Remus stood on Platform 9 ¾,. It was Harry’s first day at Hogwarts, having never attended a wizard school before, he was extremely nervous. He lived with his Godfather Sirius, and his partner Remus together in 12 Grimmauld Place in London. Before then, he had been living with the Dursleys, his mother’s relatives. And let’s just say they were not the nicest sort of people to be around. 

Harry’s parents were murdered when he was a mere child by a wizard cult leader named Voldemort after he broke in their home. He was arrested as sentenced to death. Harry miraculously survived that fateful night, and he had a lightning bolt shaped scar to prove it. He was then placed in care of his mother’s sister. But Harry, living under a cupboard under the stairs of 5 Privet Drive for 11 years had no idea about the truth of his family until his Godfather, Sirius came to him one day and picked him up from the cruel household and into his own home, where Harry had been living ever since.

Everything in Harry’s life had been hell when he was living with the Dursleys until one day, a mysterious letter came addressed to him. A letter to Hogwarts. He never got the chance to read or open it, because the next thing he knew, his Godfather Sirius had came to the house and adopted him that very same day. When he saw the letter, his eyes widened as he burned it up with a spell and threw it in the trash. Harry, at the time, didn’t really think much of it because he was then offered to live with his Godfather, and he accepted of course, anything over the Dursleys.

His Godfather had sent him to a muggle school and at the same time, homeschooled him about the wizarding world with his partner Remus, that meant muggle teachers were the only teachers he knew. However Remus and Sirius did teach him some magic at home, and his best subject was probably Defence Against the Dark Arts. Both of them showered Harry with love and warmth. Harry was forever grateful of the two men. The letter to Hogwarts arrived every year, and every year except this one, Sirius has ripped it up, swearing about how the wizarding world made Harry’s life a living hell and how much damage it had caused him and the family. Every time Harry brought up the subject, Sirius would always make excuses saying they shouldn’t be involved with the wizarding world. He claims there was too much stuff Harry didn’t know.

Harry knew what everyone who was a wizard was probably thinking, muggle-schooled kids were freaks. But it wasn't like that with Harry. His family was totally normal. Except for the fact that Sirius was framed for his parents murder and wasn’t let out of prison till 4 years ago. And also the fact that Remus was a werewolf.

But as the years progressed, Harry’s fascination with the wizarding world had increased, and he had wanted to go into the there and study in a real wizarding school like the other wizards and witches. Sirius denied at first, but after a long chat with Remus, they decided to let him attend Hogwarts, and didn’t tear up the letter. So it was goodbye, muggle London. Hello Hogwarts.

And now, Harry Potter. Age 15, stands at Platform 9 ¾, looking at the Hogwarts Express in awe as he takes his first step into the wizarding world.

"That's good," Remus said, "Stay close."

Suddenly, Sirius pulled him into a fierce hug and held him tight. Harry, just hugged back awkwardly and looked around the platform, hoping nobody saw him.

"I can’t believe you’re going to Hogwarts!" He sobbed, he then pulled away and looked seriously at him. “Have you got everything? Your wand? Your books! And oh don’t forget-”

“Sirius!” Harry laughed as Sirius pulled him into a hug again.

“It’s too soon for you. You’re too innocent and sweet for the wizarding world!” Sirius said again.

Harry heard Remus sigh.

“Sirius, we’ve talked about this, he’ll be fine!”

But Sirius wasn’t listening. 

“I should’ve burned the letter like I did for the past 4 years!” He said. “Are you sure he’s going to be safe?”

“Sirius, Harry’s ready now.” Remus pulled him away and kissed him on the cheek. “Besides, there’s nothing he can’t handle. We’ve taught him, everything he needs to know, remember?”

Sirius hesitated but eventually smiled with a defeated sigh. Harry dashed forward to embrace both his adoptive parents in a hug. He smiled, comforting his godfather. He really ought to not worry so much. He guessed it was natural for parents to cry on their child’s first day of school. But this usually happens when the kid is 5.

Harry smiled at the both of them as they watched him push the trolley towards the Hogwarts Express. 

"Okay, I'll see you next term."

At that moment, Harry pushed the trolley, when a few kids dashed past her with their own trolley at lightning speed. He was almost hit by it, when Sirius gasped.

"I'm okay!" Harry reassured him, "Sorry. I'll be careful."

As Harry entered the train, a number of spells and curses narrowly missed him as they flew back and forth inside the train. He turned to the cabin beside him, and saw a group of Ravenclaw students, almost all of them were wearing glasses. Most of them had books and pens in their hands, while the others were engaging in a conversation that Harry recognised as wizarding politics. He was so busy observing them he bumped straight into the door, causing a loud thump. They all turned to look at him suspiciously.

"Hi," Harry said politely. 

The witches and wizards merely gazed disapprovingly at him, eyeing his glasses, causing Harry to keep walking.

In the next cabin, there was a bunch of Slytherin students. The guys were relaxing with their backs on the seat, juggling a Quaffle between themselves while the girls were talking about wizarding gossip and simultaneously putting their makeup on. The next cabin was full of energetic looking Hufflepuff students, which Harry recognised from their yellow robes, who seemed to be holding what looked like small vials of golden potion in their hands and seemed really giggidy. The smell was rich but they all looked pretty high. The next, a group of loud Gryffindors were fake wrestling on the ground and shouting loudly like madmen while eating and scattering candy wrappers all over the floor. 

Harry found himself with nowhere to sit. He moved deeper into the carriage and stood beside one of the windows, looking out with a sad sigh.

...

He was so relieved when he’d finally arrived at the school. The castle was amazing and huge. He looked around the old walls in awe as he entered his first lesson, Transfiguration. He noticed a mature looking woman stood at the front of the classroom, and approached her.

"Hi, I don't know if anyone told you about me. I'm a new student, my name is Harry James Potter."

The woman, who turned out to be a mature student, looked weirdly Harry and gave him a look before rudely saying,

"Who cares?"

Harry had never been so embarrassed. He heard two people laughing behind him, and he turned to look at them. 

The first, was a short, girl with long bushy brown hair, and looked very formal and stiff. By her side, was her best friend, who had Flaming red hair and his shirt and tie were worn loosely. Whilst dismissing their laughter, Harry went to take a seat.

"You don't really plan on sitting there, do you?" called a voice from behind her.

She turned to see it was the same bushy haired girl.

"Dean Thomas will sit there to be next to his boyfriend," she stated plainly.

At that moment, Dean entered. He was big, and tall, and quite athletic, not to mention pretty attractive. Immediately, he leant over and started making out with the boy next to him who was short and his hair was all messed up, he had a strong Irish accent.

Harry watched in horror and blushed, before moving to the front row seat, before he was interrupted again,

"Don't sit there," It was the ginger boy this time, "Do you want to carry attendance sheets to the office every day?"

Reluctantly, Harry moved on to the third chair.

"No," the girl said, horrified.

Harry sighed, turning the to girl in annoyance. She pointed to the boy in front. He was fat, and ugly looking, and from the Slytherin house, apparently his name was Vincent Crabbe.

"He farts a lot."

Truthfully, he did look like a guy who would fat a lot, so Harry got up and sat next to the girl.

"Thanks," Harry smiled.

Ron looked over to him, eyeing him cautiously.

"Hey, so which Quidditch team do you support? " He questioned him enthusiastically with a smile, to which Harry jumped back in shock.  

“Uh… Holyhead Harpies?” Harry said slowly.

“WHAT? AW NO!” Ron bellowed, and Harry yet again was jumped by his sudden mood change. “Does nobody here support Chudley Cannons?!”

The bushy-haired girl giggled at Ron and turned to Harry.

"This is Ron," she gestured to the boy beside her, "He has the emotional range of a teaspoon."

With a look of shock and horror, Ron hit Hermione over the back of her head with his textbook.

"Nice to meet you," Harry said politely.

Finally he’d made a friend.

A tall, dark skinned guy also from the Slytherin house walked past the group, turning to Hermione.

"Nice wig, Granger. What's it made of?" He spat.

People around him burst into laughter. Hermione, however, was quick to reply.

"Your mum's chest hair!" she shouted and turned back to Harry. “I’m Hermione. Lovely to make your acquaintance.” 

A stern, old and odd looking man walked into the classroom. He had an extremely long, grey beard, very much like his hair. He was also wearing some half moon spectacles. Overall, he was very intimidating. He looked about the classroom for the teacher.

"Where's your Transfiguration teacher?" he asked, his voice low and quaking slightly.

At that moment, in ran what must have been their Professor. She was also quite old, but seemed nicer than the man.

"Settle down now." she had a broad Scottish accent, "Good morning, class, I do apologise for my lateness today."

It was then she noticed the head stood in the doorway.

"Oh, Albus, good morning," she greeted him, a little nervous.

The head simply smiled at her comment and turned to the class.

"All right. I just want to let everybody know that we have a new student with us. He just moved here all the way from muggle London."

Many students turned to look at an odd, timid boy with very curly black hair and brown eyes. He had a daydreaming expression. Everyone presumed it must have been him.

"What are y'all lookin at me for?" He said, his voice a high pitch, "I’m from America.”

The transfiguration professor cringed and forced a smile. “Great!” 

"Let’s help him to adjust to his magical life here at Hogwarts. His name is," the headmaster continued, looking down at a note card and reading off it, "Harry  _ Podder _ . Where are you Mr  _ Podder _ ?

Harry raised his hand a little,

"Oh," He said, "That's me. It's pronounced like  _ Pottah _ ."

The class was suddenly a little disinterested.

"My apologies," the old man continued, "I have a nephew named Anfernee and I know how mad he gets when I call him Anthony. Almost as mad as I get when I think about the fact my brother named him Anfernee."

"Well, welcome Harry and thank you, Professor Dumbledore," the teacher smiled.

Dumbledore smiled at her and pulled out a pack of candies and began eating. He offered McGonagall one but when she declined he simply smiled and left. Chatter erupted again and Hermione turned to Harry.

"Where are you going first period?" she asked.

Still not quite used to his timetable, Harry took out a printed roster.

"Fifth Year Divination. Classroom E4.

Ron looked over to Hermione, a glimmer of amusement in his eyes,

"I think that's in the east wing," He said to her.

She agreed.

"Yeah, that's in the east wing."

"We'll take you."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys!! I had this idea of a Mean Girls x Harry Potter crossover for a while now. Hope you enjoy!!   
> Don't hesitate to leave a comment on what you thought!! :)


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